Deciding to decide can change your life!!!
So are you a good decision maker or one who keeps ruminating, pondering, questioning, doubting and procrastinating and beating yourself up no what you do or don’t do?
This is a very popular topic with my clients. The inability to choose or decide can wreck some peoples lives and self-esteem.
Every moment of your life you are making decisions to either support you in a happy healthy life or not!
Your decisions do not define you… so what exactly is holding you back?.
Fear? Are you fearful you will make the wrong decision? From my experience of working with clients, the stress, fatigue , exhaustion and mental torture you put yourself though is far worse than any negative outcome of your decision.
So make your decision and go with it.
You can always change your mind.
You will always learn from the experience…
Stop saying you are no good at making decisions or whatever other negative language you use. Your subconscious mind hears everything so it will then bring your negative thought process into reality for you again and again…proving you were right!
For big decisions one thing I always do is get a blank sheet of paper and divide it into two …one side is the pro’s the other for the cons, A or B, yes or no or whatever is relevant and write down everything I can think of for each side.
This helps me to see both sides of the argument much more clearly. It makes the thought process much more tactile and factual and something you can actually control.
LISTEN TO THE ANSWERS WITH YOUT HEART
WHEN YOU MAKE YOUR DECISION
ACT UPON IT…
Being indecisive creates doubt, fear, fatigue, worry, stress and inaction…It will burn you out and can massively affect your digestive system.
With indecision…You remain stuck and stressed… The more you put it off, the more the thoughts ruminate in your head and the more stressed you become , the pattern keeps repeating until you change it.
If you are feeling bad over some past mistake or decision which you have made…STOP IT!!!
It will get you nowhere.
Let it go…Forgive yourself and allow yourself to move on.
Live for TODAY.
MAKE THE RIGHT DECISION FOR YOU TODAY! Today is all you have for sure!
Where has your poor decision making ability come from?
Did someone tell you, you were bad at it?
Is it driven by fear…something bad will happen if you make the wrong decision? or are you worried over what others will think of you if you make such a decision?
Is it due to lack of self-esteem or self-confidence? Have you relied on others to decide for you, were you never allowed decide when you were a child?
Have you always gone along with things to keep the peace or to be liked or accepted and fear rejection or loneliness or something else if you now stand up for yourself and make a decision which is in line with your values and your true self-worth?
Here is the fact of the matter…Not every decision will be the right one. It will never all be perfect. You can only do your best at that moment in time, learn from it and believe you are in control and you can change it at any time.
You do not have to justify or explain your decisions to anyone.If others do not like your decisions or react negatively to them that is their stuff, not yours. Once you are being true to yourself and not violating anyone else your decision is something you need to stand by for your own health, happiness and sanity!
Here are the Four Most Important Questions to Ask Yourself When Making Your Decision.
1.Is this decision/opportunity or task something I really want to be, something I really want to do or something I really want to have? Yes or no… yes I really do want and need a new car
2.Is being, doing or having this opportunity going to help me reach my goal or target or reach my decision? Is having this car going to help me in some way or another? yes or no?
3.Is having this car, is doing this thing, is being this thing in align with who I am , is it going to create further opportunities for me? is it important to me? Yes or No
4. Is being, doing or having this opportunity going to violate the rights of others? Is it taking advantage of others, is it taking away other peoples choices? Is it all down to you? The answer here really should be no, if it is not, is this truly what you want?
Also a really good exercise to do to build your decision making muscle is to write down all the decisions you have made which have gotten you to where you are now, look at all the great ones. Start feeling good about all of those to help boost your self-esteem and self-confidence.
Start off really gently if this is a big issue for you. What have you decided to wear today , and why? Was that an easy or a difficult decision to make? What did you decide to eat for breakfast, why? did it make tofu feel good or bad… you get the idea. Focus on what you have decided upon and change your belief that you are no good at making decisions.
Until you change your belief nothing can ever change.
You must believe and TRUST.
Here are some affirmations which can be very helpful.
- I am good at making decisions
- My decisions are supportive of me
- It is getting easier and easier to make decisions
- All is well as I trust my decisions.
The more decisions you make the better at it you will become.The more you do it the less thinking you will do about it and the more you will FEEL in your heart and gut whether your decision is RIGHT FOR YOU.
Stop worrying about everyone else first…it is time to put you first and do what is right for you.
When you make your decision…
THE FREEDOM AND RELIEF YOU WILL FEEL WILL BE PRICELESS!!!! Enjoy it.
To get more help with this we can work one to one in person or virtually. Just email to arrange. If you are not yet on my mailing list you can join here and get a Healthy Monday Boost every week.
I would love your feedback, any comments or questions please comment below. Thank you,
PS. Life blossoming Clients;
Step 65 is all for you. Watch the video and go through your work book there for extra juicy decision making help!