Affirmations….Are they working for you?
Probably No….So please keep reading and find out why!
Positive words can have such a profound positive impact upon our thoughts feelings and behaviours, yet we so often seek outside approval of these from others but continue being our own greatest critic and hardest master.
As human beings we THRIVE on praise and encouragement…yet we seldom give any or enough to ourselves as we deem it to be bad, selfish or wrong to be nice to ourselves and praise ourselves as we go along. We are so often conditioned to believe that self-praise is no praise!!!! If this is what you believe then ask yourself is this really true and are you willing to continue believing this belief if it is not serving you today? if you are done with it, then let it go so you can move forward with true self-compassion and love.
Affirmations are one way of instilling hope, belief, confidence and reassurance when we are on a low ebb or are low in self-esteem…
So what exactly are affirmations? They are sentences or phases repeated frequently.They are used to help reiterate a new state of consciousness, increase awareness or affirm new feelings, thoughts and behaviours…so you can have a brand new focus and achieve more of what you want.
Do they work?
The answer is: Yes……….ABSOLUTELY!!!! BUT….Only when used correctly and for the right purpose….this is why for most they do not work…
Many of my clients use affirmations and hang on to them for dear life, but are frustrated because they are not seeing the results they expect and this happens for a number of reasons.
- They say affirmations without any real clear intention behind them, they merely utter words so it’s a bit like lip service, words by themselves are meaningless…
- They do not believe in what they are saying… e.g “I am fit”…comes out of the mouth but the mind or your saboteur or your limiting self-belief immediately jumps in and says… “oh no your not, never, not on your life” etc etc So there is constant conflict..this is like having an argument over and over with yourself, it will drive you further away from your goal or whatever it is you are trying to achieve in the first place.
- They say them because they have been told to or because they have heard they are good so they think they too should be saying them!
- There is no real heart felt effort, connection, burning desire or gut feeling to go along with the words…
So here is what you can do instead to make what you are saying MORE REAL and aligned with your mind, body and goals.
1.Pick something you desire to feel or BE but you do not yet feel or have …e.g you want to improve on your fitness levels but right now you are a million miles away from it but you desire it more than anything!
2.Believe it is fully possible for you to believe you can “have” or “be” this thing you desire … You absolutely want to BE fitter and believe with a proper plan, commitment and regular action you can achieve it
Then choose POSITIVE IN THE PRESENT WORDS to help you affirm these words so you can rewire your brain and have new thoughts focused on what you actually do want to achieve e.g
I am getting fitter and fitter,
I am enjoying feeling fitter,
I am enjoying being more active everyday…
I love moving my body,
I truly can be fit,
These are just examples but this is the whole point. They need to be customised and they need to be specific for whatever it is you wish to achieve, accomplish and become…What may be perfect and work for one person may not have any impact upon another…so the words and their meaning to you are very important.
They need to FEEL RIGHT…So play around with the words until they sit perfectly for you.
Never use any negative words/langauge e.g
I don’t want to smoke anymore
I don’t want to be lacking in confidence
If you are saying the same affirmation for weeks, months or years on end, you need to ask yourself why? if you have not made progress for example in getting fitter within a reasonable time frame you need to ask why? what is your block or belief around not getting fit.
The affirmations act as a guiding reminder and tremendous support to set you up on the right intention/thought process for the day, so if you get up in the morning and start saying your affirmation you have much greater chances that day of doing more of the activities which you enjoy to help get you fitter…
The affirmation when used properly can act as an amazing support and your very own cheer leader cheering you on and encouraging you to put one foot in front of the other, so you see then once you embed the new habit of more movement or regular exercise or whatever it is for you, you won’t need the affirmation any longer because you will be doing it and you will be feeling more fit, energised, on top of things etc…
Do affirmations need to be recited out loud?
No, saying the words quietly in your mind will have the exact same impact as saying them out loud once you say your affirmation with meaning…that’s the crucial piece.
However at first I recommend you say it out loud so you can hear what you are saying and by hearing it you can more quickly assess how it sounds and feels..keep tweaking it until it feels right, once you believe it to be possible, repetition of it will keep you in the zone 🙂
Do Affirmations need to be recited in front of the mirror?
No, However it can deepen and enhance the experience as you are seeing, feeling and connecting with yourself on different levels , so once again, it can help, but it is not critical. Feeling and believing what you are saying is what counts!!!
How often should I be saying them?
There is no SHOULD…It is entirely up to you but like anything new you are trying to improve upon or practice…the more the merrier but most importantly FEEL whatever it is you are feeling.
Then take action upon whatever your goal is for you!!!
Enjoy, chat soon
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